Remember The Days You Prayed For The Things You Have Now
You know how people ask you, "Hey! How are you?" and you say, "I'm fine." regardless if you're fine or not? I've had people ask me how I've been doing for the last 5 months and I haven't been "fine" but I've said it to keep from imploding, or to keep from breaking down again. It's been rough. And I believe our lives roll through seasons of rough times and smooth sailing. One thing I am grateful for is that this hasn't been a rock bottom for me, but it's just been a period of low blows, disappointments, frustration and high stress. This included a Christmas season, so remember that everyone goes through some type of personal hell during that month, just to calibrate where I'm coming from.
This has also been a time where I've gotten some great experiences, experiences I wouldn't have if I didn't jump feet first off my cliffs of opportunity. So it's been very confusing as to why I've finally gotten to where I've been fighting to get, yet, feel so crappy while having them. It's a catch 22 and it's been STUPID.
As the fog has cleared from this time, I'm able to look back and process what I've come out of as I head into a new season...
You've seen the graphic that says, "Remember when you wanted what you currently have?"
I kept thinking about that over these last 5 months and feeling like such a brat for complaining and being ungrateful for the things I have, that I pleaded God to give to me, because they were hard and difficult. I questioned everything. I soul searched and I HAD to just KNOW that I was doing what I was supposed to with my life.
Something I've discovered about myself and that I've been confused about, is that if things become difficult then you're not supposed to have them. If walls start closing in, your time there is done. But this is UNTRUE!
FRIEND!
LISTEN!
When things get hard, that's when you buckle yourself in and brace for impact. It's when you dig your heels in ever more. It's when you put on your big girl (or boy) pants and show up. I prayed for all that I have in my life and God has done this crazy, insane thing and given them to me. And they're BIG responsibilities and I'm learning how to juggle them and honor their place in my life. And sometimes, I have dropped the ball and not done great at it, but I have picked those balls right back up and began juggling them again. I've learned to find my voice. I've learned to manage my time. I've been acquainted with anxiety that tries to overwhelm me and I plan to learn to work through that more.
The enemy wants to disarm us and make us believe that we are ineffective, that we're too messed up to make an impact and that we aren't good at what our dreams are, so we should bury them.
Tell. That. Voice. To. Shut. Up.
My daughters were given flowers from their grandma called amaryllis and they've been watching them grow over the last 3 weeks. We have a cat and the cat loves to pretend like she's in the jungle while laying around them watching out the window where they get light. Yesterday, my youngest daughter had one of those earth shattering meltdowns and I've learned to not sprint towards those but rather let them come to me if they really need me. Well, the cat broke her amaryllis off the bulb and she was heartbroken. But I told her it could still bloom, it wasn't dead and that we just needed to go to plan b for this flower to open. We got a mason jar and filled it with water and what do you know!! Today, that flower opened up and it is beautiful!
If your flower ever breaks from the bulb (cat induced or not), it's not over. It's just time to redirect and push harder for what you need to have it open up and bloom into something beautiful! Life is terribly difficult. It's part of our broken world we live in and we have to learn to fight for the things we want to do in this life. Our dreams were put there by God and it's up to us to chase them and make them happen.
I'm changing the quote that I mentioned earlier to this:
I'm moving forward with my life. Things have settled and calmed and I am in a good place now where if people ask me how I'm doing, I can actually reply with "I'm AWESOME!" because I AM! And in my last blog, I talked about how fasting and prayer can help you recenter your life and get you back in alignment with God. I've been fasting since January 1st and really listening for God to speak to me and tell me what's next and WOW is He LOUD! I've been listening to Bob Goff's podcast, Dream Big, and getting some incredible, sound advice on everything I want to do. I made a vision board for 2020 and beyond and it's a tall glass of water for what I plan to accomplish before Jesus calls me home. I needed direction and guidance. One thing Bob tells us to do over and over again is to speak out our dreams.
Today I am speaking out my next dream and that is to begin a skate ministry.
This skate ministry will be for whomever wants to come to the skate park with my husband and kids and me and we will help you out as much as we can on whatever wheels you bring, we'll have water for you and some music pumping (if it's allowed) and then we'll share about Jesus with everyone who comes. God is putting this directly in front of my face over and over again this month so I'm deploying the dream and making it a reality.
So, my friend, it's time to squash those voices silencing you. It's time to step up and start making a plan out of your vision. It's time to walk into what it is you want to do with your life and make things happen!
This has also been a time where I've gotten some great experiences, experiences I wouldn't have if I didn't jump feet first off my cliffs of opportunity. So it's been very confusing as to why I've finally gotten to where I've been fighting to get, yet, feel so crappy while having them. It's a catch 22 and it's been STUPID.
As the fog has cleared from this time, I'm able to look back and process what I've come out of as I head into a new season...
You've seen the graphic that says, "Remember when you wanted what you currently have?"
I kept thinking about that over these last 5 months and feeling like such a brat for complaining and being ungrateful for the things I have, that I pleaded God to give to me, because they were hard and difficult. I questioned everything. I soul searched and I HAD to just KNOW that I was doing what I was supposed to with my life.
Something I've discovered about myself and that I've been confused about, is that if things become difficult then you're not supposed to have them. If walls start closing in, your time there is done. But this is UNTRUE!
FRIEND!
LISTEN!
When things get hard, that's when you buckle yourself in and brace for impact. It's when you dig your heels in ever more. It's when you put on your big girl (or boy) pants and show up. I prayed for all that I have in my life and God has done this crazy, insane thing and given them to me. And they're BIG responsibilities and I'm learning how to juggle them and honor their place in my life. And sometimes, I have dropped the ball and not done great at it, but I have picked those balls right back up and began juggling them again. I've learned to find my voice. I've learned to manage my time. I've been acquainted with anxiety that tries to overwhelm me and I plan to learn to work through that more.
The enemy wants to disarm us and make us believe that we are ineffective, that we're too messed up to make an impact and that we aren't good at what our dreams are, so we should bury them.
Tell. That. Voice. To. Shut. Up.
My daughters were given flowers from their grandma called amaryllis and they've been watching them grow over the last 3 weeks. We have a cat and the cat loves to pretend like she's in the jungle while laying around them watching out the window where they get light. Yesterday, my youngest daughter had one of those earth shattering meltdowns and I've learned to not sprint towards those but rather let them come to me if they really need me. Well, the cat broke her amaryllis off the bulb and she was heartbroken. But I told her it could still bloom, it wasn't dead and that we just needed to go to plan b for this flower to open. We got a mason jar and filled it with water and what do you know!! Today, that flower opened up and it is beautiful!
If your flower ever breaks from the bulb (cat induced or not), it's not over. It's just time to redirect and push harder for what you need to have it open up and bloom into something beautiful! Life is terribly difficult. It's part of our broken world we live in and we have to learn to fight for the things we want to do in this life. Our dreams were put there by God and it's up to us to chase them and make them happen.
I'm changing the quote that I mentioned earlier to this:
If you're not praying over your dreams, here's your charge to begin doing that.
I'm moving forward with my life. Things have settled and calmed and I am in a good place now where if people ask me how I'm doing, I can actually reply with "I'm AWESOME!" because I AM! And in my last blog, I talked about how fasting and prayer can help you recenter your life and get you back in alignment with God. I've been fasting since January 1st and really listening for God to speak to me and tell me what's next and WOW is He LOUD! I've been listening to Bob Goff's podcast, Dream Big, and getting some incredible, sound advice on everything I want to do. I made a vision board for 2020 and beyond and it's a tall glass of water for what I plan to accomplish before Jesus calls me home. I needed direction and guidance. One thing Bob tells us to do over and over again is to speak out our dreams.
Today I am speaking out my next dream and that is to begin a skate ministry.
This skate ministry will be for whomever wants to come to the skate park with my husband and kids and me and we will help you out as much as we can on whatever wheels you bring, we'll have water for you and some music pumping (if it's allowed) and then we'll share about Jesus with everyone who comes. God is putting this directly in front of my face over and over again this month so I'm deploying the dream and making it a reality.
So, my friend, it's time to squash those voices silencing you. It's time to step up and start making a plan out of your vision. It's time to walk into what it is you want to do with your life and make things happen!
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